Misery

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A terrible thing happened last week. We were on our holidays and friend S1 called with bad news. When I was in high school we were a group of five friends. We were always together in school. Even after school we used to chat on telephones. Those were the days of landlines. I remember my ammamma scolding me for being on phone most evenings. Thankfully, she used to have her own friends visiting her at the same time, so there was no eavesdropping. School was fun because of R, M, S1 and S2.

Fast forward 25 years. We have a WhatsApp group, named fabulous five. It was slightly altered and labelled after Enid Blyton's 'The Famous Five' series by yours truly. Barring early days, the group was silent for the most part. It was active during birthdays, anniversaries, and festivals. Rather than chatting through messages we were comfortable conversing with each other. It was not regular, but we were abreast with what was happening in each other's life. 

M has a grown up daughter. She and I follow each other on Instagram. Though we have not met I felt like I know this girl from the status updates and her mother's narration. That little girl committed suicide. I was in utter shock, so are my friends. More than that we are worried about M. She was the most soft and sensitive girl in our group. We know how this incident is going to turn her life upside down. She had wonderful home, loving husband, financially sound background and two beautiful children. She was this person who counted her blessings every single day. She was an ardent devotee and pious woman. Is it God's way of testing her devotion?

In my mind M is just a girl with school uniform and curly hair in two braids. It pains to think about her soft and giggling voice. It pains to think about her at all. They say sorrow of losing child is eternal. They say time heals everything. In this case I want the second one to be true for my friend's sake.

I feel sad for that little girl who took this extreme step. People ask me why the girl who had everything had to take her own life? Was she suffering from depression? Most probably yes. I could not sense an iota of sadness or cry for help through her social media. She seemed like the usual teenager who did the adolescents stuff. Fortunately or unfortunately she had written a death note citing the reasons for her death. I don't know if that is good enough closure for her parents and kid brother.

Reeling with heavy heart   

So Far

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Everything seemed slow and lethargic, yet time moved so fast. It has been two-and-a-half years into the pandemic. No one knows whether the days of Corona are behind us. Life has been normal from the past year or we pushed it to be normal. The fear is overtaken by the frustration. I've been absent from this space for a long time. Life had been busy with traveling, reading, binge watching, and socializing. And I did not have the mojo to write anything. Every time I tried writing, the blank space stared back at me. Same with all three blogs. I know I've bitten more than I can chew.

I start everything with great enthusiasm and fanfare, but get bored easily. I'm distracted by newer things, onto it with gusto, and lose interest. And there goes the merry-go-round. This is a personality trait I'm not very proud of. Yeah, I'm the proverbial "Jack of all trades, master of none." As I type this I'm thinking of starting a blog in Kannada and my mind is already searching for apt names.

Still enjoying the perks of working from home. I don't think I can ever again go back to regular work. COVID has spoilt us in a way. It is a blessing in disguise for people like me who wants minima to zero human interactions.

We broke the barrier of traveling overseas in April visiting Nepal for our tenth wedding anniversary. Before COVID if you had money and time you could have traveled anywhere. You cannot say the same thing now. Each and every time we plan a trip, we had to weigh and calculate the risks keeping Corona in mind. It is tedious, exhausting. I'm not very fond of airports, airplanes, flying, immigration. I just tolerate them for greater good. When you are bitten by a travel bug, there is absolutely no cure.

Life has been kind so far. I hope to be frequent here. Only time will tell.

The Month That Was April-2021

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Living life in déjà vu. Last wedding anniversary was in lock-down. With international trips out of question we thought we will travel within the country extensively. Again, we had to cancel our trip due to the weekend curfew that eventually turned into a statewide lockdown. Determined not to be bogged down by this we booked a luxurious hotel within the city to get the much needed pamper and break. Most people don't understand why we had to opt for this when we had all the privacy at home. Everyone deserves to splurge a little on grandeur for exotic experiences on their special day.

I was running fever for straight 3 days without cough or runny nose. It is good to mention I had lost sense of smell and it continued for a month. Since the symptoms were negligible I had not opted for COVID test, but this time I knew for sure it was Corona. According to me I had contracted this virus twice, each during respective waves. No one was prepared for the second wave. This time around it hit closer to home. Uncle D had been tested positive. He just had bypass surgery in January. Entire family was on edge. Fortunately despite being a primary contact Ammamma stayed negative and uncle recovered in no time. Because the trains were operating cousin M1 managed to travel to be with the family even in the middle of lockdown. We heard news of many people losing the battle. The cry for oxygen and hospital beds were terrible. And the elected government continued to disappoint. I know I'm fortunate to have food on the table, roof over my head, means to nourish my mind, and my loved ones safe and healthy. That can't be said for millions of countrymen.   

We had been to native for Ugadi. Mother stayed with us for 10 days before the lockdown. Because of this my reading got limited to only 3 books. They are Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe-Benjamin Alire Sáenz, Beach Read-Emily Henry, and Educated-Tara Westover. Among them 'Educated' impressed me so much so that I went ahead and watched Westover's TedTalk, her interviews with Oprha and Degeneres. 

The movies were Ramprasad Ki Tehrvi (Hindi), Jijo (Malayalam), The Great Indian Kitchen(Malayalam), Madam Chief Minister (Hindi), Love (Malayalam), Kilometers and Kilometers (Malayalam), Uyare (Malayalam), Sudani From Nigeria (Malayalam), Halal Love Story(Malayalam), Jati Ratnalu (Telugu), Pagglait (Hindi), Roohi (Hindi), Tuesdays and Fridays (Hindi). The Great Indian Kitchen is one of the best movies of recent times. In fact it should be made a part academics to sensitize the young minds about gender issues.

Our tryst with Crown ended in the first week. Hippie Sabotage's Devil Eyes video unexpectedly made us to see the Peaky Blinders' version. As crazy as it might sound I was instantly hooked to the swag of Shelby family and dragged hubby to the five seasons of crime drama. My current ringtone is also Otnicka's form of Peaky Blinders. If I could have my way I would have given Hubby a peaky cut, but he vehemently refused the offer. His loss anyways! During the course of this we're saddened to hear the demise of Helen McCrory who played Polly in the same.

One of the best experiences was to watch the iconic drama 'Mukhyamantri', played by Mukhyamantri Chandru. It must have been the 750th show. We all know how Chandru got the screen name, but never thought we will be fortunate enough to see him play the original character. Though little weak and old, on stage he has the same charisma way better than the silver screen. And continued our theater fest with new drama, Matte Mukhyamantri by the same troupe and artists.

April has been kind. Hope for the same in May.

Laundress

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A large pile of dried clothes is staring back at me to be folded. Another dirty heap is accumulating in the laundry basket. One more lot is drying in the hanger forever. Have you ever hoped the clothes can get folded itself?

I enjoy sniffing the freshly dried clothes. I use generous dose of fabric conditioner just to satiate my sensory pleasure. I don't believe their claim of keeping clothes soft and wrinkle-free. Setting dirty laundry into the washing machine is the only easier part. You need an immense level of patience to entangle them before putting it out to dry. I sun dry only bed spreads, blankets, duvet, towels, and mats. Rest of them will be hanged inside. I wash them in the evening so they will be bone dried by morning. Since the railings are higher I take hubby's help on this particular chore. And I don't forget to mention "couple who dry clothes together stay together".

My extended family is aghast when I told them I wash clothes only thrice a week. Some were very curious about the specifics. It was a sight to behold when I mentioned we put our undies to the machine. Later I was told none of them would put their appliance to such an impiety. Pardon me for metaphorically washing my dirty laundry here.

As hubby wears formals to office, those shirts' cuff and collar needs to be cleansed separately before machine washing. It hardly takes 5 to 10 minutes, but getting to do that needs a herculean will power. No matter who does the chores. We both feel the same.

And most dried clothes stay in the guest room. Since I've the work station there I get to see them continuously. Do you know how much time consuming it is to fold socks, undies, hankies? Since two of us cohabitate the fabric needs to be arranged separately. Sometimes when guests arrive unexpectedly I just grab all clothes and dump in the cupboard. At that particular time this method was life saving. But you will realize the impact of that hurriedness only much later when you try to find a matching socks.

Because I wear casuals to work (pre-corona era) I don't have to iron them. And hubby's clothes are outsourced for pressing. This is the laundry woes of just two people. Imagine the plight of pre-washing machine generation. While conversing about these things Ammamma never forgets to mention we Millennials have easy way out. If this is the smooth sailing what I'm complaining of? Are we inherently a generation of somnolent or is it just me?

The Month That Was March-2021

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It is exactly a year since Corona wrecked havoc on mankind. Yes, it started way back in December 2019, but we Indians felt its presence only in early March after the 15-days states'curfew followed by unplanned nationwide lockdown. while randomly chating with friends I asked anybody is interested in meet-up. To my utter shock everyone readily agreed. This must be the fastest planned get-together and executed effortlessly. Same goes with meeting one of Hubby's friends and family. This month also marks one in first of hanging out with Y.B and SIL sans nephew A. One notable thing here is none of them tired us with their kids'shenanigans until asked about. Maybe it is a conscious decision on their part considering our childfree status. Or maybe they want to converse something different other than the kids.

Due to the busy social life we could watch only two movies, Act 1978 (Kannada) and The Trail of Chicago (English). And 'The Crown' seasons continued. Exactly a year ago we had to cancel the show 'Pukkate Salahe' due to curfew. Incidentally we started visiting theater for the same drama this month.

The books I've read this month are "A Gentleman in Moscow-Amor Towels, The Beekeeper of Aleppo-Christy Lefteri, Pachinko-Min Jin Lee, Home Before Dark-Riley Sager; and Sparkling Cyanide-Agatha Christie. In the begining of this year I made a conscious choice to pick books set in different parts of the world. There is a famous saying in Kannada 'Desha Nodu Kosha Odu' (Travel the world-read books). Since traveling is restricted I metaphorically transport to these countries to hear about the stories. I've even zeroed down on where to stay when in Moscow. It maybe entirely different establishment now, but since it is functional still why not get a sneak-peak into Count Alexander Rostov's life. My tryst with #christiechallenge2021 continued with 'Sparkling Cyanide'.

 I couldn't give much time to gardening. As much as I love seeing greenery around maintainting plants is a difficult task and it needs constant nourishment, pruning, repotting. The only plants flourishing without doing anything on my part are aloeveras. With little water and more sunlight, they thrive astoundingly. I think I need to learn better time management skills to pursue many unrealistic hobbies of mine.

March has been kind. Hoping for a peaceful April.  

Insignia

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When I visited the bank last week I had to sign a form for some investments. When I took a closer look three signatures looked completely different from one another. Once or twice my credit card and cheques got cancelled because of the mismatch in inking. And believe it or not I've to practice signing in a notebook to get it right every single time.

When I was young I wanted to have a signature like my father. It was stylish, crisp, and cool. While filling the tenth board examination form I was told what I sign on that would be my ultimate signature and after that I can't change. So, I practiced and mastered a insignia that is nothing but cool or trendy. Over the period of time that transformed from uncool to ordinary. Now, I've a sign that is just my name with hopeless curving in the end. Sadly I remember my failed attempts to achieve that perfect sign every single time.

Adding to the agony is when soft wares of banks and others refuse to recognize my dowdy marking. This makes me wonder why can't we go back to thumb impression? It is unique and no two individuals can have the same print. It can't be forged. Why thumbing is associated with illiteracy? Doesn't cellphones these days sell with fingerprint as key security feature?

Enough with the rant now.

The Month That Was February-2021

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Two important men in my life celebrated birthday in February. My father would have been 69 this 14th. I miss hearing his reluctant 'thank you'. No amount of emotions or words can bring him back. we could have traveled only that much together. All I have now is memories of him to cherish on his birthday. Pain of losing a parent never subsides. We just learn to live with it.

And Hubby's birthday was a close-knit affair just the way he liked it. Apparently the boy of mine is growing old and I wish nothing but abundance of happiness to this old soul.

Valentine's day befell on Sunday this year. The conversation about being slave to capitalism and love should be celebrated every days is all invigorating. Why assume we don't. Why pull down people who chose to celebrate this day with their valentine? Our day was all mushy, corny, and fun.

With 'The Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia I broke the self-imposed jinx of not reading horror genre.  Other books are The Night Tiger-Yangsze Choo and The Homegoing-Yaa Gyasi. About Karvalo by K.P.Poornachandra Tejaswi, I could not stop gushing about this gem whoever care to listen. It has been a long time since I picked a book of my mother tongue only to realize what I had been missing. Parker Pyne Investigates by Agatha Christie was second in the Christichallenge2021, which was a collection of few stories. So total number 5 looks good on the chart.

Total number of movies were 10 and they are; Tribhanga (Hindi), The White Tiger (English), The Safehouse (English), Sir (Hindi), The News of the World (English), 2 Guns (English), Drishyam 2 (Malayalam), I Care For You (English), Pitta Kathalu (Telugu) and The Girl On the Train (Hindi).

One of the best series we have watched is Chernobyl (Netflix) about the nuclear disaster. We started re-watching Crown Season 1 (Netflix) because we had forgotten most of it.

Attended two weddings on one weekend, both in different towns of Karnataka. The only thing to look forward to these gatherings is food. This is what COVID isolation had turned me into, absolute non-foodie to moderate glutton.

A two-year old Aglaonema withered slowly and died. It was a gift to Hubby for attending an academic seminar in a law school. The cute little pot had no drainage hole and we just let it stay there. It took a major hit during last year's lock-down without water and nourishment, still stayed alive. I, the queen of procrastination put off transferring it to another pot for a long time. Result, completely rotted root killed the plant. Now I know how difficult it is to maintain the teeny tiny garden. I need to have a better plan to manage the time, so that I can give importance to all the varied interests I pursue.

February had been the month of celebration. March be kind.