While growing up we always had huge garden and farm land. Blessed to be born into a family of gardeners and farmers, my only interest in them was watering. Sprinkling or gushing water with big hose pipe is total merriment. That could be one of the reasons I still enjoy washing cars. Climbing trees and plucking mangoes, cashew nut fruits, Chikoo, Blackberries, Rose Apples were as easy as it could get. Monitoring the children very closely was not vogue back then. Any kind of mishap will be reported to the parents if it is absolutely necessary (read serious injury). I digress.
I never had any interest in gardening. In fact, I have never given a thought on how vegetables, fruits and flowers grow. I hate to be out in the sun. I used to make a huge fuss when asked to pluck the curry leaves. Despite that I was a frequent visitor during the rice cultivation season, from plowing to tilling to sowing to harvesting. Probably that is why I love rice!!!
My father was a man with green thumb. He nurtured and cared for plants and garden like his own kids. His vegetable patch was feast for the eyes and delicious on the taste buds. I used to gift him few plants and that was end of my responsibility.
As I've mentioned in my earlier posts we are trying to make a tiny balcony into an organic green patch and it was coming out quite okay. Then we got stuck in native during the unplanned lock-down. When we returned all our plants, both indoor and outdoor were dead, but for the Aloe Vera. We could not forgive ourselves for killing them. If it was not for the 'Aloe" we would not even think about going ahead with gardening. The little Aloe had turned into dark from its original green. Without much hope we watered it and within three days the colour returned and the foliage was bright. Not only that we could propagate and re-pot the little pup off the mother. I have named them Xena and Hope respectively. Since then we have been planting micro-greens and harvesting them every other week.
We were able to solve the bug infestation with sprinkling neem oil. We've learnt the art of propagating the plants to a certain extent. We made the colossal blunder of making organic compost at home with limited resource and the stench will haunt us for a very long time. We tried to shift the plants from full sunlight to partial. Sometimes we over-watered the plants and sometimes under-watered them. Weekends were spent in potting, propagating, re-potting, harvesting, and sowing. The herbs were used in tea, salads, chutney, stir fry, and sambar. The Malabar spinach has been my favourite leafy vegetable since time immemorial. Now, I have the privilege of growing, harvesting, and enjoying them in culinary. The supply is not sufficient to fulfill our weekly demand. We still buy vegetables from outside. But the happiness to see the sprout is endless and the little effort is totally worth.
Gardening is no rocket science. There is no right or wrong. We learn it by experience. Plants are the most resilient. They tolerate sun, rain, heat, cold, bugs. Still they thrive to sustain with whatever little they have. We may not be able to give them lot of attention but they bloom and flourish with minimum care. Co-gardening with hubby also lets us to spend more quality time together.
Green thumb is a total myth. Anybody can garden with little patience and effort. One day we are hoping to get the mythical and proverbial 'Green Thumb' tag. Until then happy gardening.
Monsoon started in the state and the climate in Bangalore is to die for long drives. However, consciously we made the decision not to venture out even if its in our private vehicle. Hubby started going to office from this month and my paranoia knew no bounds. Almost spending two-and-a-half months together day in and day out, this separation was painful. This must be the first time in 14 years' of our relationship that we get to spend so much quality time together. My withdrawal symptoms were evident. Have I forgot to gush about how Hubby being my own personal brand of drug?
I compensated the void by reading five books this month; Huntress-Kate Quinn, The Alice Network-Kate Quinn, The Lost Man-Jane Harper, In Five Years-Rebecca Serle, and Daisy Jones and the Six-Taylor Jenkins Reid. After liking Huntress, I picked Quinn's 'The Alice Network', both historical fictions. I put an end to my obsession over single writer and picked other new authors.
The movie count was 11 for this month; Vrithra (Kannada), Sarileru Neevevvaru (Telugu), Maya Bazaar (Kannada), Brahma (Telugu), Gulabo Sitabo (Hindi), Shylock (Malayalam), Jumanji The Next Level (English), Choked (Hindi), Bulbul (Hindi), Unda (Malayalam), Call of the Wild (English).
We had continued our binge watching journey of Indian serials streamed on OTT platforms. They are Panchayat, Criminal Justice, Kota Factory, Taj Mahal 1989, and Aarya. I wish and hope to do a detailed review on at least few books, movies, and TV shows in the coming days.
The "stayhomestaysafe" has pushed us to don our reluctant chef hats. Hubby and I are trying our hands on cooking especially on weekends. We have started a new Insta page to show off our culinary skills and our new stints with gardening. There is always something new to learn while caring for plants. The Mexican mint leaves were wilting away even after watering adequately. I tried to keep it in full sunlight as well as partial but to no avail. Videos on gardening tells me it might be bug infested, though I could not locate any. It also suggests to sprinkle Neem oil on the plants and voila, it worked like a charm. Now the plant looks healthier and bright.
We also celebrated MIL's 60th birthday without much fanfare. The usual cake, balloons, music, food, and beverages. Ideally this is her retirement year. However, the school requested her to work for few more years and she is more than happy to oblige. She does not want to sit idle and while away time. And in the present scenario it is unlikely that she need to go to school full-time. We told it is entirely her decision whether to continue work or not.
One Friday evening while watering the plants I have noticed some barricade in front of the next-door neighbour's house. Unable to figure out what it was I called Hubby to make inquiry while returning home. It turned out the barricade was not actual barricade, but that house has been sealed down due to COVID positive. I was shocked to hear the news. Though we have never been in touch with those people the message was loud and clear. The pandemic is very much real and closer than we think. Cousin M1 was supposed to come home for the weekend as she had to attend her close friend's lockdown wedding. She chickened out after hearing the corona positivity around the neighbourhood. Once the initial shock wears off I was quite thrilled to have COVID positive neighbour. I'm quite eerie that way.
We were safe and healthy. That is all we could hope for.
It makes me angry if I see WhatsApp, Facebook or Instagram on Father's day. People are all sharing pictures of their father or father of their children. I've nothing against anybody. It reminds me of my loss, which I'am unable to make peace with. The pain is constant. Only memories are to hold on to. Those memories are the treasure now.
My father had a weird sense of humor. He was not hesitant to bring upon death in conversation. Probably that is why we always make fun about our impending deaths and it was never shushed up. Whenever I called him to wish on Father's day he never says Thank you. He says Father's day is the day when one's father dies every freaking time. As I roll my eyes I could hear him guffawing at the other end. I could see his eyes crinkling and his body shaking with laughter. And we continue our chat like any other day. While growing up Father's day was not trending and it is a recent phenomenon. Still he never once said we are aping foreign culture by celebrating Father's day. Now you know how I become the global child.
Whenever I go home for holidays everyone in dad's office would know of my arrival. No, I'm not that nosy or loud. I always have this habit of painting both my parents' nails with latest splash. He would flaunt those colours proudly with elan announcing his daughter's visit. How many fathers will indulge their children's quirky nature in this way? I don't know any.
When his hair is grown a little I used to put a tiny pigtail on him. Yet, I didn't want his colleagues to see this. On appearance he looks serious, strict, fierce, and little scary. Only loved ones knew his soft, mushy, and childish side.
Many people don't know I started watching cricket for Rahul Dravid. I had a huge crush him. I never stuck any posters of him on wall or anything. And it would not even get noticed when you have two cricket fanatic brothers coexisting. Coincidentally I was vacationing at home when Rahul Dravid got married. And my father started pulling my legs by saying "Ah he is married now".
Same goes to Shahrukh Khan. He was my favourite since Baazigar. No, I didn't wait for Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge to happen. However, I never had any crush on him. And my father never missed a chance to make fun of him whenever SRK appeared on television. That would lead to a squabble and me sulking for the rest of the dinner. He used the same trick on my brothers who adored Sachin Tedulkar. It took us sometime to understand his tricks or probably we grew out of that adoring celebrity stage.
And he was our partner-in crime in wrestle mania. This theater form was introduced by my brothers and we're all hooked simultaneously much to the annoyance of mother. Even after we flew out of nest my father continued with this pastime. It was a delight to see him enjoying this mock combat and drama. He will be so engrossed in it shaking his head, laughing, cheering. And we discussed about it as if that is most important topic in the whole universe until the novelty of this drama faded out. Mother used scold us all saying we all have violent streak in our gene, otherwise how can anybody stand such an aggressive and rough show.
As he is not coming back memory is all I've and memory is all I shall cherish.
When the lock-down 2.0 was lifted the private vehicles were allowed to move intrastate as well as interstate with passes. We had applied for passes in Taluk office. It is here we witnessed the disaster caused by the unplanned 4-hour notice lock-down. The entire area was crammed up without any social distancing and police were trying really hard to control the crowd. People from other states looked horrid and helpless without knowing the local language and no clear instructions on what to follow. Have you ever wondered why News channels do not give such information, which could help the stranded people? Does anybody know what to do when tested COVID positive? No, Arogyasetu app does not solve anything. We helped few people to get their documents in order. Fortunately, KPSclearpass website was up by noon and we obtained one-time one-way pass online. Still we wanted to see whether we will get the physical pass that we applied in the morning. The place was still jam-packed without any respite. As luck would have it we procured the physical pass as well.
During the journey we were stopped once for the pass and twice for temperature check. The police on-duty looked haggard, overworked and tepid. The pandemic is taking a toll on everybody in individual capacity. Though we weren't instructed we compulsorily followed the home-quarantine measures.
The home was not a disaster as was expected. Sadly all our garden plants died but for aloe vera. They paid the price for our mistakes and it is deeply hurting. If it was not for our beloved 'Aloe' we wouldn't dare to venture out gardening again. For me our little Aloe is the Corona survivor, the symbol of hope. The labour of repotting, seeding, sowing, propagating, watering continued. The joy of seeing the tiny seedling is immense and rewarding. The once forgotten dream of becoming the farmer has kicked in again. If my father was alive he would be proud I guess!
We had lot of catching up to do with movies and we did; Thappad, Angreji medium, Street Dancer, Varathan, Kannum Kannum Kollaiyadithaal, Shubh Mangal Zyada Saavdhan, Extraction, Chaapak, Trance, Body, Frozen 2, Darbar, Ayyappanum Koshiyum, Haram, Bad Boys For Life, Ford Vs Ferrari, House Owner.
Reading took a backseat with hubby to goof around. 'A Woman is No Man by Etaf Ram was the only book I was able to read. I've the next months to compensate on that.
The first television series we consumed was fourth season of 'The Last Kingdom' followed by the superb Patal lok. I need to do a review on this show soon. To take a break from the intense crime thriller we settled on 'Four More Shots Please' allegedly Indian version of 'Sex and the City' much to Hubby's chagrin. Despite the reservedness both of us enjoyed the show. We concluded the month with Special Ops and Asur.
E. Brother is contemplating about quitting the job. The job market is not favourable in this pandemic. Anyway he is worn out from the current one and feels if he could not leave it now he probably will never be able to. Even though worried, I'm nothing but supportive in whatever decision he makes.
We completed and celebrated our 14th year of being together in a quiet manner only to hope next year it would be a gala event. For the first time we had no choice on this matter. With no restaurants, pubs, theaters, and restrictions on traveling where on earth one can hope to go? For an introvert person like me social distancing is not a problem. However, I would like to have the options of going out anytime anywhere whenever I want. A small virus is causing havoc all over the world and bringing every one to their knees.
May has been kind. Hoping for better June.
This ain't a song or a poem. We all imagined falling in love with a person in a romantic way. When one does the Adrenalin rush is immense. Everyone would have experienced the excitement to hear their voice, the eagerness to meet them, talking endlessly to sweet nothing, seeing the world through rose-tinted glass. Being in love is a wonderful feeling. I'm not trying to be a love expert here.
I fell head over heels in love with this amazing soul 14 years ago. And I still fall for him every single day. When his name flashes on my phone I have this goofy smile from ear to ear. His talks are music. My heart starts racing every time I see him. No, I don't have tachycardia. I start missing him the moment he leaves. I feel Monday blues not to go to work, but for being separated from him after spending weekends together. I can't get enough of his snuggle dose. I can't keep my hands off him when he is around. I'm not addicted to any substance. Nonetheless, he is my own brand of drug.
Six years of courtship and eight years of tying the knots has not changed anything in our relationship status. I feel married only when visiting the extended family. And lot of people say I have not changed after marriage. I always swallow down the urge to say "I'm just married, not reborn". I digress.
It is easy to fall for a person who is dashing, super intelligent, kind, and confident. It is easier to fall for a person who believes in equality. How hard it is to fall for a liberal who roots for individual choice every single time?
I never found jealousy and possessiveness in a boyfriend endearing. If he was so, it would have raised a red flag in the beginning. A self-assured and secured man is foremost important in any relationship. Among millions of good qualities about him, why I emphasize only on few? Today many people aspire to become a couple like us. They were vocal enough to say we set their relationship goals right. I'm flattered and humbled every time somebody says this because that is a huge compliment. In a hurry to get into a relationship they fail to see the caliber of the person who made it possible, and wreck their relationship. I'm anguished for any broken alliances, be it friends or foes, especially if they were influenced by us.
Why being with self-assured and secured person is important? Because he does not stifle your personal space. He only encourages and cheers you for the smallest accomplishments. When somebody shares the household chores without a hitch you will realize why being a believer in equality is important in the long run. When you feel you're living the life you wanted to live you will understand why having a liberal watching your back is imminent. People say I'm lucky to find such a life-partner. I could not agree more. At the same time this person was not hand-picked by my parents and handed over to me on a 'arranged marriage' platter. Falling in love is easy and its novelties are astonishing. But holding to that person against all odds was my choice. Family, friends, society tried very hard to break the spirit in all possible ways with good intention. (With good intention) is added especially to keep everyone happy who stalk this space occasionally.
Falling in love is beautiful. Falling in love with the right person is magical. Keep in search of that wonderful person who loves you the way you are. When you do, make the choice to hang on to them. Life doesn't come with a warranty card. Invest time and emotions in a relationship, not money. I'l stop the ranting before I turn into an annoying preacher.
Falling in love with you is easy. And staying in love with you is easier because I still fall for you every single day. Hope you find time to read this piece one day. Happy anniversary to us.
The whole month was spent in in-law's place due to lock-down and that is the first. What I've realized during this period is in small towns the time does not move at all. I kept myself busy from morning to evening with office work, reading, and writing. I had uploaded vibrant flower photos to insta feed from the well tended garden. There were no household chores either to attend as the maid was coming twice a day. From 5 o'clock in the evening, I used to get the feeling as if the time stood still. Hubby would finish his work around 6:30. Mil is happy watching News and movies on television. Hubby and I have stopped seeing News a long time ago. We were horrified beyond our wits to see how the News channels are communalizing the significant pandemic. And as far as movies are concerned, I would have watched most of them and seeing it again on television with breaks was next to impossible. We would take much needed walk for an hour or so. As I've not packed any paperbacks, most of my readings were limited to phone. And continuous reading on phone put a lot of strain on my eyes.
Despite that I was able to read four books this month. Those were "The Death of Ms. Westaway-Ruth Ware, Where Forest Meets The Stars-Glendy Vanderah, Jugari Cross-Poornachandra Tejaswi, and Ask Again, Yes-Mary Beath Keane.
The movies were limited to just four, all of them were re-runs; Sri Krishnadevarya, Babruvahana, Guru Shishyaru, Prachanda Kulla. These were the movies which I enjoyed tremendously as a kid. They still are relevant to this date, only I was not in good state of mind to appreciate them.
We followed the lock down trend of Dalgona coffee. Tried to grow microgreens in the backyard, but lost them for heavy monsoon showers. I could have taken another attempt at it, however, the gloom was seeping in. When the whole country was burning candles to chase away the Corona, my heart wept for the ignorance of my countrymen. A silver lining of hope came the next morning when I talked to my mother. She flatly refused to do this charade and stood her ground. I couldn't be more proud of her and I'm glad I raised her well (pun intended). At the same time I am ashamed to acknowledge few of extended family members and friends succumbed to this national farce.
We celebrated our eight wedding anniversary in this lock-down quietly. Mil baked cake for this occasion and I'm obliged for this gesture. It is not quite the anniversary I was hoping for. If everything was normal we would be chasing sunset in the tropical paradise Mauritius sipping Cane Rum. This Force majeure was unexpected and spoiler. Nonetheless, there is no one else I would want to be isolated with other than Hubby.
These chaos and devastation too shall pass, until then we should hold our horses.
How was your April?
On normal days I don't watch news at all. I think it must be more than 3 or 4 years now. To be informed with current affairs I read news online for few minutes and be on twitter. Screeching anchors, breaking news readers, prime time debaters have made me to turn down the television forever.
Currently I'm at in-laws' place. Here I am reintroduced to news again and nothing changed much. I'm shocked beyond my wit about how they communalize an issue at the time of a pandemic. No surprise here. India is a country that runs most on religious sentiments. At least the current situation made me to believe so.
Let's go back to my growing up years. Nothing to brag about, but neither my parents nor my grandmother were bigots.
On Christmas eve we used to walk over to friends' house to check the Christmas crib and tree. The first ever piece of cake I had was at their home. Still I vaguely remember the Carols sung by them during the moral period. Yes, those days were simple. Visiting church was an extravagant affair back then. And mind you I was not even studying in Christian convent. Bible, Jesus, Mary, Joseph stories were narrated by them in great detail. We used to giggle and whisper whether bride and groom would kiss on their wedding day. Diana, Dorita Winnie, Pinto, Fernadez, D'Souza, Chaco were very common in the class and neighbors.
Same goes for Afrin, Naseeba, Musrat, Rajiya, Nishreen, Nawaaz, Asif, Sadiq, Nehreen, and many others. At the time of Hindi Antakshari competition everybody wanted them on their team because their knowledge of songs from 50s to retro to 90s was impeccable. Since I'm a vegetarian I was always kept away from kebabs and biriyani. Only dish I was given was Sheer Khurma on Eid. I was part of their beach picnic most weekends as I was not allowed to go near water body without adult supervision because of a freak accident many moons ago.
In the same way all of them were part of our festivals be it Ganesha Chaturti or Deepavali. We all participated in large number of cultural activities as one. We were not taught to differentiate one another based on the religion, at home, at school, or in society. Partaking in town fairs with friends was the fanciful event each year.
I'm the person who has changed many schools, had different sets of friends belonging to different communities, stayed in different towns and neighborhoods, yet my experience remained same. And suddenly from the past few years all I see is hateful messages towards particular community in all forums. Even in social gatherings people spew venom as if it is the most natural thing to do. Hubby cuts down such malicious arguments then and there with logic, for that I'm proud of him.
I've completely stopped interacting with fanatic friends and acquaintances. I've disowned bigot cousins and family members. I've tried my best to educate them on religious harmony in vain. It must be easy for them to hate somebody based on religion, caste, class, creed, or gender, but that is not me. The alarming issue is they all have children and I dread to think whom they are going to raise with so much hatred in their heart. If this hostility is passed on to next generation there is no hope for this country and we are all doomed.
History has never been kind to people who often tend to forget it.
